Resolutions Revisited: Wow, I Suck

Let’s be honest here.

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How many of us have kept our New Year’s Resolutions?

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Let’s get a show of hands.

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(Now, this is the part where you all raise your hand and make me feel less horrible about completely failing at my goal this year.)

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Oh good…none of you.

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Now that that’s out of the road, let’s talk goals.

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While losing weight and sticking to P90X this time wasn’t really my New Year’s Resolution, I did mention it in my second ever post as one of the goals I had for this year.

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And whether P90X meant P90X or just a whole lot of hardcore exercise, this goal hasn’t seen a whole lot of progress. School this past semester was a lot more exhausting than I had first imagined, and the stamina and will power I needed just wasn’t there.

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But before I continue to justify myself with excuses, I just want you guys to know that I’m not beating myself up about this.

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No, really.

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Don’t get me wrong, it would be very easy to hate myself right now. Just look at the title of this post. But what I’m really trying to focus on is not how much I’ve failed, but how easy it will be to try again.

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In fact, I’m starting today.

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Yes, this very day is going to be the start (again) of a new phase in my life, a phase where I start to take control of my health and happiness, do my best, and forget the rest.

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I can’t focus on tearing myself down if I’m trying to bring myself up.

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It’ll be hard. I’ll be out of shape again. I’ll probably want to quit after my workout tonight. And maybe I will. The point is I’m trying.

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And I’m going to try to try harder.

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For myself, for you guys, and for that results post I so badly want to blog about and you all probably don’t want to read.

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Too bad, because for the next 90 days, I’m going to bring it. And so should you.

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With your goal.

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Not mine.

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Unless your goal is the same…

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You get the point.

Just look at that motivational sunset…

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P90X: I Hate It, But I Love It

In the spirit of all things resolved, I thought I’d share one of my failed resolutions from a New Year’s past and exactly why it failed in the first place.

As I briefly mentioned and slightly exaggerated in my first blog post, I, like most refreshed New Year hopefuls, once attempted the famed “lose weight this year” resolution. My weapon of choice? P90X.

Now, I know what you’re thinking. Well, not really. But for the sake of my point, you’re thinking something like this: P90X? I bet you got in the best, most ripped shape of your life. Cause with Tony Horton, you’ve got to bring it!

No.

Well, yes. But, no.

Did I get ripped? Was I in the best shape of my life? Briefly. Do you have to bring it? Most definitely yes. P90X is a hard program and not for the faint of heart. You’re not sweatin’ to the oldies with this one. You’re sweating to the shrill cries of your muscles ripping apart, taking a mid-set break, and then reattaching themselves again and again. But when you’re finished, your brand new t-shirt stain feels like a glorious badge of victory. It’s a love-hate relationship.

yousuck

But after 90 days you won’t.

Honestly though, P90X is really nothing groundbreaking. It’s basically good old fashioned exercise and healthy eating. No gimmicks. No shortcuts. It’s grueling hard work for the full 90 days.

Though I guess I can’t really testify to that, because after bringing it for about 60 days, I gave up. Why? Not because it wasn’t working. It was. I had lost ten pounds, lowered my body fat percentage by about 6%, and just felt better.

My problem was that I had gotten lazy. I started off being really rigid about what kind of food I put into my body, making sure I followed the meal plan in the little diet book that comes with the program (How many cups of cottage cheese is the equivalent of a chicken? Vegetarian problems). Then after a while, I started to feel like I could just estimate how much food I should eat. I didn’t need to measure out my portions. I’ve got this down. Wrong.

I started feeling sluggish again. I didn’t crave the exercise anymore. What used to be everyday workouts turned into every other day, then maybe a few times a week, then for longer periods of time I wouldn’t exercise at all. Now, the past year or so has been a battle between gaining everything back and maintaining the weight loss.

The problem wasn’t the program. Tony Horton knows what he’s talking about. He’ll kick you right where you need to be kicked and then make you come crawling back for more.  The problem was me. I lost my focus, my motivation, and in the meantime, all the self-confidence and progress I had made. Now I just have to get them back.

And since I just finished off the other half of my Cheesecake Factory vanilla bean cheesecake, I’m thinking I need to make an appointment with Tony for a little more butt-whoopin’ soon. And this time, I’ll stick with it.

Oh God...

Oh God…What have I done?